That's right. For a profession consisting of tens of thousands of individuals trained in the art of inspiring folks to say YES, the most important skill fundraisers (especially fundraising leaders) can cultivate is saying NO.
You may ask: "How can that be?", and you may be thinking: "I've been conditioned much of my professional life to say yes." And therein lies the rub. Many of the fundraising leaders with whom I work as a professional coach have a very strong "Pleaser Saboteur". A saboteur as defined by Shizard Chamine in his NY Times bestselling book Positive Intelligence is an automatic and habitual mind pattern with its own voice, beliefs, and assumptions that works against our best interests. And, by definition a saboteur is insidious. It works in the shadows in a gradual, subtle way with harmful effects.
In particular, the Pleaser Saboteur indirectly tries to gain acceptance by helping, pleasing, or flattering others. The negative impact of the Pleaser is often one of burnout, as I observe fundraising leaders saying yes to far too many unimportant (although perhaps urgent) tasks that come their way.
So what is a leader to do? Just say no? As simple as it seems, that would be a very good start. I've previously written about my own less is more philosophy. In that post, I offered an inquiry: "Can we simplify our lives, and thereby make them more meaningful?" I believe we can, and Greg McKeown is his excellent book Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less eloquently expands on the inquiry.
McKeown, a writer, speaker and Harvard Business Review blogger, offers concrete advice on how to deliberately focus on the vital few priorities that really count and dispense with the rest. McKeown observes (as I have) that many professionals are over-busy and over-committed. They continue to say yes to ever more commitments and deadlines without asking the following questions:
Is this truly essential?
How important is this to me?
What do I really want here?
Is this really how I want to choose to spend my time?
How is this aligned with my values and purpose?
I believe if you are truly honest with yourself (and ignore the voice of your Pleaser) when answering these questions, you will say NO to upwards of 90% of the requests and opportunities that come your way. And by doing so you will have a much more powerful impact as a leader on your world, and with the people around you
I highly recommend McKeown's book, and I encourage you to incorporate more NO into your life.
No comments:
Post a Comment