Let Go...

...of the need to know.


And,go with the flow.

Are You Flourishing?

Early on in the 1998 film, Rounders, Mike (Matt Damon) gets completely wiped out by Teddy KGB (John Malkovich) through an "all-in" wager in a game of Texas Hold'Em.  Mike pledges never to play poker again, reverting to his law school studies during the day and driving a truck at night (owned by Joey Knish and aptly played by John Tuturo) to earn cash and make deliveries.

As Mike unhappily grinds it out, his good friend Worm (Ed Norton) is released from prison.  When Mike learns that Worm is indebted to Teddy KGB through a vile and dangerous loan shark, Mike returns to playing cards in order to free Worm from his debts prior to the repayment deadline.  The two come close, and then loose it all in a game with troopers in upstate NY (and get beaten to a pulp because of Worm's cheating).  

Worm decides to flee.  Mike takes on his debts, and asks his mentor--Law School Professor Pretrovsky (Martin Landau)--to loan him $15,000.  Professor Petrovsky cuts Mike a check for 10G's, and Mike returns to Teddy KGB for a game of no limit Texas Hold'Em to free his friend from debt and regain his poker playing mojo.  In the dramatic and suspenseful climax of the film, Mike defeats Teddy KGB, wipes out Worm's debt, earns enough to repay Professor Petrovsky, and retains "three stacks of high society" ($30,000), which is enough to stake him in the World Series of Poker.

At the end of the film, we see Mike entering a taxi cab headed for the airport.  The driver asks: "Where ya headed?"  Mike responds--"Vegas." The cab driver offers Mike good luck.  Mike (to himself and the audience): "Luck has nothing to do with it".

In this memorable film, we have a fine illustration of principles outlined by Aristotle in the Nicomachean Ethics as to what it is to lead a meaningful life.  The central value for Aristotle is eudaimonea.  While the term is most often translated as “happiness,” it can also means “to live well” or “to flourish.”   

Aristotle argues that flourishing people can be evaluated on three dimensions. The first of these is the dimension of virtue or excellence (we learn that Mike is an excellent poker player). The second dimension is practical wisdom (we see that Mike knows how to get things done). The third dimension is moral strength, which involves both knowing the right  thing to do and setting aside overriding desires that might prevent us from doing it (Mike will not cheat at cards, even if it is to save his friend). 

According to Aristotle, flourishing requires all three dimensions of character—virtue, practical wisdom, and moral strength.  Although that is not enough.  Aristotle argues that a flourishing life unfolds in a larger context that includes material goods and friendship.  Mike clearly plays poker not only for the pleasure derived from the game, but also because of the money that can be earned (material goods) and for friendships (Worm, Joey Knish, and even Teddy KGB).

I encourage you to watch the film while keeping in mind Aristotle's explanation of a meaningful life.  Then you may want to ask yourself the question: "Am I Flourishing?"

Making A Mess

In the 1930's and 40's Oliver Hardy of the slapstick comedy duo, Laural and Hardy, was fond of saying: "Here's another nice mess you've gotten me into", after some calamity befell the pair.

And so it is that: "life imitates art far more than art imitates life"--Oscar Wilde

Recently, I've been discussing strategy formation and decision making in the context of data.  It would appear that with the advent of the digital age our society is obsessed with data.  There's BIG DATA, and little data.  There are entire academic and professional fields of  Data Analysis and Data Visualization.  How on earth did the human race make any progress prior to data?

Here's how--intuition.  

Intuition is that human ability to understand something immediately, without the need for conscious reasoning, or data. Thomas Edison had this ability.  He claimed that his invention of the phonograph was an act of pure intuition.  Other masters from antiquity to the modern age also possessed this great capacity--as do we all.

We've become so data-driven that we often get stuck in the paralysis of analysis.  I will submit that nothing significantly innovative, creative, or entrepreneurial was ever accomplished by analytical, deductive reasoning.  By definition, an act of creation is one of inspiration, not perspiration (except in bed, when it is both ;-))

People may ask: "how am I to decide without data?"   The answer is: meditate.  The mind is like a glass of water with dirt in it (notice DIRT = DATA).  Stir it up (analyze) and you can't see clearly.  Let it settle (meditate), and the mind becomes a crystal clear pool of water from which right action emerges.

More often than not, we make a mess of life when we do not listen to our intuition, or our inner knowing of what is right.  When this happens and a decision goes sideways or south, I offer the advice my mom often shared with me in my youth: "clean up your #mess!"

Time Is On Your Side

In 1964 The Rolling Stones declared that: "Time Is On My Side" on a b-side single. Despite this pithy bit of wisdom that has resonated through the pop culture for 40 years, many of us have a saboteur that often suggests there's not enough #time for everything in life.

The truth is--time is an illusion.  Einstein knew this (space-time continuum).  And, as Eckhart Tolle puts it (paraphrase): "We may use clock-time for practical purposes, but there is no future and no past.  There is only the now."

Sometimes we lose sight of this fundamental truth.  Life evolves moment to moment, and as much as we attempt to schedule every moment using clock time, that technique inevitably leads to frustration, anxiety, and disappointment.  I have found that it is more graceful to enter the river of life and swim with its flow.   

When I am caught up in clock time angst, I find it helpful to:  "Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these."-- Matthew 6:28-29

So when the clock starts running your life, which do you prefer: toiling and spinning, or flowing and swimming?
 

How You Gonna Do It?

 
In an early 1980's song, "Get Down On It", Kool and the Gang asks:

"How you gonna do it if you really won't take a chance
By standing on the wall?"

The refrain is: "Get your back up off the wall."

Besides taking me back to an enjoyable time of my youth when dancing was a regular part of most weekends, the song recently reminded me about the benefit of taking #initiative.  I notice that when I am inspired to do a thing, I sometimes hesitate, or get stuck by the little voices that start to tell me all the reasons why I should not do it.  

The hesitation, or doubt, seems natural enough.  Perhaps its just a bit of caution, or fear of the unknown.  When the voice is particularly strong, it can sabotage good intentions.  What I do know is that when I begin a thing and start down a path, the way becomes more clear. It reminds me of the Robert Frost poem, The Road Not Taken:

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, And sorry I could not travel both And be one traveler, long I stood And looked down one as far as I could To where it bent in the undergrowth; Then took the other, as just as fair, And having perhaps the better claim, Because it was grassy and wanted wear; Though as for that the passing there Had worn them really about the same, And both that morning equally lay In leaves no step had trodden black. Oh, I kept the first for another day! Yet knowing how way leads on to way, I doubted if I should ever come back. I shall be telling this with a sigh Somewhere ages and ages hence: Two roads diverged in a wood, and I-- I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference. - See more at: http://www.poets.org/viewmedia.php/prmMID/15717#sthash.KvwzDNfJ.dpuf

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, And sorry I could not travel both And be one traveler, long I stood And looked down one as far as I could To where it bent in the undergrowth; Then took the other, as just as fair, And having perhaps the better claim, Because it was grassy and wanted wear; Though as for that the passing there Had worn them really about the same, And both that morning equally lay In leaves no step had trodden black. Oh, I kept the first for another day! Yet knowing how way leads on to way, I doubted if I should ever come back. I shall be telling this with a sigh Somewhere ages and ages hence: Two roads diverged in a wood, and I-- I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference. - See more at: http://www.poets.org/viewmedia.php/prmMID/15717#sthash.KvwzDNfJ.dpuf

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,

And sorry I could not travel both

And be one traveler, long I stood

And looked down one as far as I could

To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,

And having perhaps the better claim,

Because it was grassy and wanted wear;

Though as for that the passing there

Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay

In leaves no step had trodden black.

Oh, I kept the first for another day!

Yet knowing how way leads on to way,

I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, And sorry I could not travel both And be one traveler, long I stood And looked down one as far as I could To where it bent in the undergrowth; Then took the other, as just as fair, And having perhaps the better claim, Because it was grassy and wanted wear; Though as for that the passing there Had worn them really about the same, And both that morning equally lay In leaves no step had trodden black. Oh, I kept the first for another day! Yet knowing how way leads on to way, I doubted if I should ever come back. I shall be telling this with a sigh Somewhere ages and ages hence: Two roads diverged in a wood, and I-- I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference. - See more at: http://www.poets.org/viewmedia.php/prmMID/15717#sthash.KvwzDNfJ.dpuf

So, "What you gonna do? Do you gonna get down?"

Help!

"I can of my own self do nothing" (John 5:30).  

Often, we get caught in the trap of believing we need to do it all by ourselves.  Big mistake!  That's the ego taking control, and we know what the outcome looks like when that happens, don't we?

Unless you are a hermit (in which case it is unlikely that you would be reading this post), many of us work in organizations, live in communities, have families, and otherwise interact with a variety of individuals on a regular basis.  When faced with vexing problems (or just day-to-day challenges) it is often wise to connect with someone in your network and ask him or her for help.  

If you feel that the issue or problem is not suitable for anyone in your network, then feel free to reach out to an independent professional adviser, consultant, counselor, coach, guru, imam, minister, priest, rabbi, etc.  

When in doubt, I find that recalling the 1965 Beatles song Help can be inspiring.

Stop Worrying. Just Stop It!

In a humorous exchange, a prospective new client walks into Bob Newhart's office for an initial counseling session.  Bob explains that he charges $5 for the first 5 minutes, and then nothing thereafter.  The client agrees, and the counseling ensues. 

If you have 5 minutes, I recommend you go to the videotape at http://youtu.be/Ow0lr63y4Mw.  If you do, you'll laugh out loud, and you're perspective on #fear and #worry may never be the same.